After a few days of menial labour and product testing it becomes apparent that a significant other schlong isn't the only thing missing from John's life, and it's here we were caught a bit off-guard when the game gradually changed into a journey of self-improvement with you and John as the travellers. All of this narrated in much the same style as The Stanley Parable, with your actions prompting responses from the narrator, adding context and humour to the somewhat bizarre experience of literally dicking around. The whole thing starts off innocently enough, with a boring job, a boss who yells at you for not performing well enough, and awkward interactions with colleagues. Then to John's dismay, an invitation to his high school reunion pops through his letterbox and he's hit with a bout of insecurity and anxiety to the tune of: 'What will my classmates think of me and what I've done with my life?' With the reunion looming, only six short months away, it's up to us to help John stop cocking up his life, hopefully also get a date, and help him deal with his fear of ridicule at the hands of his childhood bullies. He's stuck in a dead-end job, he's single, and his apartment kinda sucks. In this tale of woe and worry we follow John, who is a bit of a dick (if you know what we mean). The tone is set right off the bat when we're greeted by a shower of peckers that spell out the logo of the game, complete with rather detailed sound effects, and it's all downhill from there. Some of you may have already played the multiplayer version of the game, since it was a bit premature (something that's normal and happens to a lot of men, or so we've heard), or in Early Access as some prefer to call it.

It can best be described as one of those 'easy-to-pick-up, hard-to-master' party games, in the sense that it's easy to explain, often best enjoyed with a pint or two, but if you're really dedicated to slamming all your friends it'll take some time to become the best.

In the game you and up to seven of your closest friends take control of a pair of 'meat and two veg' and the goal is to try and screw each other. Fear not though, as these are merely digital dongs, and there's actually a lot of fun to be had with this party game, more than just giggling at the virtual phalluses. Genital Jousting pretty much took the gaming world by storm by letting players take control of a penis, and so if you've clicked on this review you've pretty much got a sense that this game isn't for the faint of heart nor is it for the whole family.

Genital jousting release